It’s Christmas Day.
And nothing really seems different. I don’t know. I think I have never experienced a Christmas this lonely. Yes there were Christmases that made me feel sad or sentimental – it’s actually supposed to feel like that for some people. But this time, I just feel empty. Maybe it has something to do with spending Christmas with a broken heart. Hahahahaha…
But I guess I’m not the only one feeling this. My friend, Ximo, texted me at 3am this morning and she was sad because this was the last Christmas she’ll be spending with her family (she has nursing duties the following years) yet her older brother’s not home (I guess spending Christmas with his girlfriend) and her parents were quarreling over a petty thing.
Maybe it’s also part of growing up. There’s a little longing for that old Christmas spirit when you’ll be crowding beneath the Christmas tree, excited to open your gifts. But now we’re older and we have to accept that we have a new role for Christmas.
Sadly, I also got lazy shopping for gifts this Christmas. In my last two years in college, I have successfully planned and made presents for my classmates and friends, and even my family, and have given them out before the holidays. But this time I just managed to buy a milky bone for our dog. Haha! But I also promised myself that I WILL buy stuff after Christmas. I also got lazy of personalizing my Christmas text messages but at least I sent them out to most of the people in my phonebook. And even if most people will greet you Merry Christmas and tell you to indulge in eating and eat eat eat, we just had a simple noche buena last night. I didn’t even insist to eat a little later than our usual 7pm dinner which I usually do during Christmas. I also didn’t brag my grandmom to actually prepare something special. So that will do.
I’m also starting to wonder why we should have a Christmas vacation at school. I mean, this year we have 11 days of holiday for Christmas. I guess that’s just enough, right? I just bummed out the rest of the days last week. Or maybe there’s just something wrong with me.
Hay, I should get my head straight. Preparation is key! Hai! Hai! Hai! After this day, I’ll try to spend more quality time for me and everyone else!
Merry Christmas!
